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Common sense abducted

Aliens: Why They Are Here		“recovered memories” of abduction
by Bryan Appleyard		produced under hypnosis. And his
		account of the cultural origins of
IN NOVEMBER 1974 the giant Arecibo		modern ufology and alien-mania is rich
radio telescope in Puerto Rico		and rewarding, fortified by a detailed
broadcast a special message to M13, a		knowledge of science fiction and
distant cluster of 300,000 stars, some		marred only by a tendency towards
of which might be orbited by life-		hectic prose.
bearing planets. The message		Yet Appleyard cannot leave it at
contained line drawings of a human		that. He wants to suggest that we
being, together with details of the		should look at the claims of the
molecular structure of DNA and other		abductees with more respect; he argues
such useful information, and it ended		that the differences between [id:54127]
with the cosmically fatuous word “Hi!”		should be “blurred”, on the grounds
As Bryan Appleyard points out, although		that whatever happens is, in the end,
this message has now been travelling		just happening in someone’s head. This
at the speed of light for more than		is a surprisingly mushy conclusion,
30 years, it is still roughly 25,070		coming from such a clearheaded
light years from its destination. “It		thinker and writer.
will arrive in the vicinity of M13 in		Unfortunately, the blurring has
the year 27,074, so we could expect a		also got into the facts. In order to build
response in 52,174, assuming they		up respect for those who believe in real
return the call at once.”		encounters with aliens, Appleyard has
The combination of [id:54120] in this story	to time) is, of course, part of our	copied historical claims from their
deserves a moment’s notice. A group	culture too. This is what distinguishes	books and websites, presenting them
of astronomers had decided, on the	[id:54123] from Tolkien’s orcs and elves, which	to his readers as if they were genuine.
basis of their scientific knowledge,	many people may have imagined but few	Thus we are told about “ [id:54128]
that there was a reasonable chance	claim actually to have met.	sighting of a UFO in 1493 by the
that intelligent life existed somewhere	[id:54124]. George Adamski for	German scholar Hartmann Schaeden”;
else in the universe. Their science	instance, author of the classic text	this is a garbled reference to Hartmann
also told them that they would have	Flying Saucers Have Landed, met	Schedel’s description of a meteorite
to wait more than 50,000 years for	Orthon, a long-haired young man from	which landed at Ensisheim in Alsace
a radioed response ¯ just as it told	Venus, in the Californian desert in	and which can still be seen in the
them that a physical spacecraft sent	1952. Adamski could tell he was an	Ensisheim Town Hall.
from M13 would take much longer, since	alien because he wore reddish-brown	Most seriously, Appleyard
no solid object can be accelerated to	shoes and “his trousers were not like	reproduces, in a list of mysterious
the speed of light. [id:54121] they went	mine”. Orthon spoke to him	disappearances, a story about an entire
ahead and made the broadcast, complete	telepathically, and arranged for him to	regiment of the British Army being
with its geeky greeting.	be taken on a tour of the solar system	carried away by a hovering cloud at
The most reasonable position to	which included a visit to Venus, where,	Gallipoli in 1915. The story (originally
take on the question of extra-	as it turned out, the late Mrs Adamski	about a battalion, the 1/5 Norfolks)
terrestrial life is that while it is quite	had been reincarnated.	was investigated and [id:54129] years ago:
possible that such life exists	According to Appleyard, there are	the soldiers were killed by Turkish
somewhere, it is very unlikely that	three possible ways of talking about	forces, and their remains now lie in the
humans will ever encounter it. This is	experiences of aliens. First comes the	Azmak cemetery. The suggestion that
an issue which should therefore rest at	“nuts and bolts” position, which treats	they had been carried off into the sky
the outermost fringes of our	them as literal descriptions of physical	was made for the first time by three
imaginations. Yet modern cultural	reality. Then there is the “third realm”	confused veterans in 1965; it was then
history tells a very different story:	approach, which says that aliens may	included in a famous faked document,
aliens now populate so many novels,	be real, but not in a physical sense ¯	the so-called First Annual Report of
films and television programmes that	like angels, they exist as some other	“Majestic 12” (an alleged top-secret US
no imagination can [id:54122] them.	kind of being, [id:54125]. And the third	Government committee on contacts
The title and subtitle of Bryan	approach is “psychosocial”: this	with aliens), which purported to date
Appleyard’s new book, Aliens: Why They	assumes that aliens are illusory, but	from the early 1950s.
Are Here, might best be described as a	tries to account for the human origins	That Bryan Appleyard should treat
bit of a tease. Appleyard, a respected	of the illusion.	this document as genuine is, alas, like
journalist and commentator, is not	The best parts of this book take the	the 13th stroke of the clock: it [id:54130]
claiming that aliens have landed; his	psychosocial approach, offering a	everything that has gone before.
“here” means here in our mental world	variety of explanations. Appleyard
and popular culture. But the fact that	summarises recent research on the	Noel Malcolm
many people do believe that aliens are	neurological origins of these illusory	in The Sunday Telegraph
literally here (or close enough, at	experiences; he also shows how [id:54126]
any rate, to snatch humans from time	we should treat the so-called