Examentrainers

Please, accept I’m different

STEPHANIE WILLIAMS, 26, has Asperger’s syndrome; here she explains how she has learned to manage her condition.

1		At first glance				even if I don’t understand them.
		you’d never know				Afterwards I studied French and
		how hard I’m				Spanish at university. Aspies are good
		trying. I dress up,				at deciphering codes, which is
		look you straight in				basically what languages are.
		the eye and watch		4		I need  27  so it was better for
		carefully for signs				me to live at home (with my parents)
		that I’m boring				as I like things to happen at the same
		you. But even so,				time every day. If I do take to
		minutes after meeting me, you may				something new it can become an
		start to think I’m a bit … well, odd.				obsession. When I decided to lose
		I tend to stare, which might make you				weight, I had to swim exactly the same
		feel uncomfortable, and sometimes				number of lengths every day. It didn’t
		I blink a lot. I can be extremely direct				take me long to slim down and I even
		although I really don’t mean to be				had a boyfriend for a while. It didn’t
		rude. I once said to someone in the				work out though, and now I’m sceptical
		supermarket: “Could you please move,				about relationships. I’m quite a naïve
		because you’re so fat I can’t see the				person and I tend to attract
		sign behind you.” I’m better now, but				manipulative or controlling men.
		for years I had no idea how to make		5		Because I’m no good at reading
		small talk. I’d start a conversation by				body language, I never know if men
		telling someone how much Elvis paid				are interested in me. I bought a book
		for his mansion Graceland or asking				to help me understand facial
		their opinion about abortion. I’d say				expressions but I still have problems
		whatever came into my head.				with my own. I tend to look blank, so
2		Being diagnosed with Asperger’s				people assume I’m not bright.
		syndrome at the age of 17 was a huge		6		When I was working at a call
		relief. It explained a lot, such as why				centre I overheard someone call me a
		I couldn’t get along with girls at school				‘pain’ because I kept asking the same
		and why I was bullied. I always said				thing. I gave my boss a leaflet about
		the wrong thing, asking them what				Asperger’s because I had been sacked
		colour soap they used or how they				from other jobs and I didn’t want to
		spelled their name. And if I thought				lose this one; a year later I was made
		I had a friend I’d be really upset if they				redundant.
		talked to anyone else.		7		I don’t want to get married or have
3		I took a drama course when I left				children. I don’t like physical contact
		school and it was the best thing I could				and I find children noisy and tiring. But
		have done. Eccentric people are				Asperger’s has its advantages: I have
		accepted in theatrical circles and, for				good attention to detail, so I can
		the first time, I had friends. It also				remember information well. I know
		taught me how to act normally; like				I have a lot to offer, I just need people
		most ‘Aspies’, I can imitate people				to accept I’m different.